Amelia M. Transcript

Hello, my name is Amelia, and I just wanted to explain a little bit about my personal concussions. I’ve sadly had eight. Three of which really stood out to me over the years. I think I suffered from so many because I was in the sports industry, I was a very active person growing up. But actually the span of eight that I got, were from starting at the age of 18 all the way to the age of 25. I’m now 27, so you know, in less than eight years, I had about eight different concussions, but the ones that really stand out to me are the ones I wanted to point out.

So, one major one I had was when I was working for the San Jose Sharks. I was in marketing, and I was also an ice girl. So, I was working on my skating one day at the rink, and I was actually alone. I mean, there was other people on the ice, but I was skating, and I clipped something– big chunk on the ice. And I ran headfirst into the boards, and I immediately was seeing stars and when people say that analogy, it is very true. You do see stars. Things kind of went blank. I remember waking up in the ER because I did go unconscious unconscious for a little bit. And then my recovery was pretty smooth. Because it wasn’t– it was a mild concussion, but that was one that really stood out.

My second one was I was in a really bad car accident. This was actually– I was leaving after I was babysitting for someone, and I was on my way to hockey practice. I had all my gear in the car and I was getting on the on ramp and someone swerves from the number one lane to the number four lane. And when this happened, she slammed on her brakes. And I had no time and I sadly ran into her. And when this occurred, my car completely just smashed into the back of her car it was totaled, my car essentially started to– it was so bad that when my head hit the steering wheel that’s what set off the airbag. The air bag did not initially deploy when I hit the person on the freeway. So once my head hit it, then it deployed so it ricocheted back my head a few times. And that was a really bad concussion. That’s when I was transferred to the hospital immediately. I got a head CT. I had to get a full MRI. I had a fractured neck, and I had a really bad concussion. That was probably one of my more difficult ones. And recovery was you can’t sleep. You have to try and stay awake for as long as you can. I was extremely nauseous. I really wish I could say if I was vomiting or not, but I really cannot recall. But I know I was very nauseous and I was also on a lot of pain medications at the time because I was in such a horrific car accident. So that was one. The doctors from there had monitored my brain. I had a lot of swelling, but not to the point where surgery was needed. But I was very nauseous. I was very– my memory was not good. I did get random, random bouts of fog. And this was before COVID. So, it wasn’t attributed to COVID brain fog, but it was attributed to the severe impact my brain took from this extreme car accident. That recovery took about, I would say, oh that took about a month. That was one of the longer ones that took and then finally and with that I was this is when I was living with my parents. My parents were a big part of my recovery. Same with, with in my accident when I was at the skating rink and went headfirst into the boards. And you know, at that time, I didn’t take time off work, which I was working with a full concussion. And this is what I was so at the Sharks and they did offer me some time off, but I just didn’t want to take it and I don’t know if it was because I wasn’t fully cognitive of how bad it was. But I didn’t I kind of do regret it because when you’re working through such a traumatic brain injury, such as a severe concussion, it’s really good to rest your brain, you know, low lights, dim lights. You know, things that don’t trigger, trigger anything. But you know, having my family there really really did help and having great access to some wonderful doctors that helped me and that really did help. I was really stressed during this time because I was going through a bit of a personal issue with my partner at the time and that I feel like that enhanced, um that enhanced sort of my recovery time as well. So that’s that was that was a big turning point for me. That brain health is so important to really, you know, your brain is the computer of the body and without it you really you’re really pretty much nothing.

And then my third one that I really, really stands out is this is when I was in college. I was a junior, and I had just woken– I have really severe and I don’t know if this is because I’ve had so many concussions but I have very vivid and severe dreams. So I can wake up seriously thinking sometimes it’ll I have issues with separating dreams from reality when I wake up and it sounds really scary to say out loud, but it’s not like I’m distorted from reality but I’ve noticed after all the brain injuries I’ve had, my dreams are extremely vivid. I have nightmares really constantly but my, I have very vivid dreams, so I can wake up and truly believe what has happened. Like I feel like that is what has been going on and that is my life. So there’s some mornings where I really have to take time and separate reality from a very vivid dream I just had. And I’m telling you it’s so vivid that I start to- not relate to it- but turn it kind of into my life which is something I’ve actually working with doctors on doing but there’s not really anything to do other than cognitively wake up and separate you know, remind yourself that, you know, that was just a dream. It’s not reality. It’s not your reality. So that’s something I’ve also noticed after having having so many concussions, that has happened. So back to my third and really, I think one that was a turning point, and that was my worst one. And it’s the dumbest one, I think, and I say it’s the dumbest one because I had woken up from a dream junior year college, which was a few years back, and I woke up from such a vivid dream. I was sleeping at my now boyfriend’s house, and he didn’t have a bed for him because he hadn’t been living there for long and he had a really big windowsill above his bed, and a huge bay window, and I woke up in like a panic and a sweat. And I slammed my head up against this windowsill where I’m telling you, the back of my head felt like I felt like I had broken my skull. I didn’t, but it was so bad. I went- everything went black for about a minute. It was so very, very bad and I think this was one of my worst ones. Because I didn’t initially go to the ER, because it was a school day. I didn’t go to school that day, but it was very bad. I was immediately nauseous. I tried to stay up for as long as I could, but I was in and out of consciousness, and I regret not going to the ER sooner but I eventually did. Same thing they told me you know that I wasn’t given anything other than you know: take a low-inflammation you know, like a, I think was a baby Tylenol or something. Like that. And that one that recovery was very long. And this was in the this was in the midst, I think of finals week too, so it was a week before finals. So I took all my finals with a very severe concussion and that was really tough. That was so tough. And I didn’t want to use the excuse of a concussion to get out of anything. And I didn’t. So none of my professors knew. So I suffered, you know, kind of in silence on that one. But that recovery was months. I think my speech was a little off at some points. I think that was one of the toughest ones and I know going forward I really want to keep an eye out like a CT scan when I can because I know it’s permanently affected me in so many ways like my speech is different. Like I said, my dreams are so vivid sometimes it’s hard to change from reality to like what is actually happening when I wake up from such vivid like dreams. Reality can become distorted. Just because they’re so vivid and it just my brain almost like applies it like this is my truth. But I think the positive that has come out of it has how important it’s made me get more involved with helping others because some people don’t take concussions seriously they’re like “oh well your brain is not bleeding, you’re fine.” No. Concussions are very serious and they leave you with lasting effects that is very true. I mean, I’m I can be a poster child of that. I did however, I will say this, I graduated top of my class. I graduated with two degrees. I graduated on the Dean’s list and I graduated with, with honors.

So I persevered really, really through a lot and I just think that having finding the right doctor that will help you alongside and take it seriously. I think finding a doctor and reading through their bios and making sure you find like a neurologist that specifically specializes in concussions is really important. Really, really taking the time like, you know, if you do sadly, get a concussion, dim lights. Really rest of you I know it’s it’s tough to say “rest your brain” but really rest your brain and rest yourself. Doing yoga and meditate like truly finding your inner peace really did help a lot a lot. I I mean after all of it I–my goals are still the same, you know, to continue on with my career in the legal world. Continue to not let me not use it as an excuse to hold me back when to remember how serious it is and I’m very more careful definitely. With with activities, like, with anything because I just know how easily you can get a concussion and how I think, you know, I’ve noticed each one I had recovery took longer on each and on every single one. I think that the brain is a really powerful thing and it’s capable of doing so much I think in time I’ll have full ability to fully be recovered, but it definitely gives you a different outlook on how precious the brain is and how careful you need to be (laughter). Some things were definitely out of my control, but I think it’s just you know, taking control of what you can. And that is my concussion story. Thanks for listening.